Aiyo, FUCK Valentine's Day!

Well, not really. Just sippin' the Haterade, dig? I have, however, noticed a dearth of Dana Scully-Lorelai Gilmore hybrids in my life, which makes this Valentine's Day kind of a drag, I suppose. Which brings me to the Gilmore Girls. Ever see that show? Some may find it a bit precious (did I use that right? Please comment!). I, however, rather like it (DON'T comment). Yeah, yeah, it's a chick show and a half. Sue me. That was a tangent. Let's bring it back.

So...Valentine's Day. I've never been one to sweat this particular holiday, which makes the mild grouchiness I've been feeling at the sight of roses and heart-shaped balloons puzzling. I'm not a hater! I swear! Or am I? Could I be? I don't like to think so. Maybe that's my problem. I always try to maintain an easy going demeanor. I can't be a hater. Why? Because "it's all good". It ain't no thing. It's all cool breezy, dig? I'm so cool, I don't feel or think a damn thing. I just go with it. Maybe I'm a zen master! Chicks dig zen masters, right? Or maybe I'm not big into communicating how I feel. I always feel like I inadvertently broadcast more about myself than I'd like (mainly about my shortcomings) through clumsy social interaction and errant body language. Why make matters worse by talking about myself? Which is possibly why I prefer communication via email, blog, etc. It's not as chaotic as face to face, in the flesh communication. All statements can be given more thought beforehand. All opinions and arguments can be enumerated, analyzed and structured. Someone you're communicating with has an interesting opinion? An interesting bit of knowledge? The only response you can think of at the time is "Wow", "Cool", or "Really"? No big deal! No stress! Don't respond immediately. Think about it a little. Let it marinate. Then come back with the proverbial hotness. Everything can be phrased just so. I understand the need to embrace chaos and all that. It's just one of those things that I have to remind myself to do whenever my old habits and proclivities start creeping back in.

Well, at the end of all this self-absorbed pondering, I still don't know what to do about Valentine's Day. What should I do? I usually ignore it. Maybe I'll do something different this time around. How about an open call? Not for a girlfrend or romance or something. It seems to me that kind of thing happens spontaneously when two people meet and find that, through a combination of common interests, sexual attraction and compatible temperaments, they absolutely enjoy eachother's company. Or maybe I'm wrong. I'm not exactly a ladie's man, dig? What the fuck do I know? Instead, I am posting an open call (to all five people who read this blog) for any geeky, pleasant females out there who are feeling vaguely misanthropic this month. We'll spend Valentine's Day getting smashed, bitching about our love lives, wishing ill on all the couples who pass us down in Tumon, and listening to Korn. It'll be fun, don't you think?



P.S. Yes, in Wayne's World, Haterade is a proper noun.