On 31 Oct. 2005, Spec 4 Derence Jack and Sgt. Wilgene Lieto, both from Saipan, were killed when their humvee was hit by an IED during a patrol. They are members of E Co, 100th Bn/442nd In. My unit. I didn't know them that well, as my platoon (first) is stationed in Guam, and the other two are in Saipan. We usually don't train together until the latter half of the year. They seemed like nice guys.
Naturally, the Saipan boys took it really hard, as did a lot of the old-timers from Guam. Thus far, this makes 3 people I knew personally who have been KIA. The first was a buddy of mine from basic training. There was a small picture of him next to his name along with several other casualties in the Army Times about a year ago. Demetrius Rice. A powerfully built black guy with a high-pitched voice who was an anime geek. A complete nerd who would suddenly flip out and try to beat the shit out of somebody.
I wasn't close enough to them to give a proper eulogy. I imagine a lot of people at this point would instead go on at length about whether their lives were a precious sacrifice for freedom, democracy, and prosperity in the Middle East and the world, or the latest sad, tragic waste in an unjust, greed and delusion fueled war that has no end in sight. What do I feel? I feel that this war and adminstration are shady as hell. I believe the insurgents we are killing are a bunch of cruel bastards filled with the hatred of true belief mixed with frustration and suffering. And speaking of the aforementioned tripod of cruelty, does that not describe the U.S.? Has not the suffering of Sept. 11, the true belief in the justice of our cause, and the frustration of not being able to pin down and destroy a singular, easily definable, responsible entity caused us to bring about the cruelty of our full military might? The cruelty of this administration's moral simplicity? I've heard that when the Marines were taking Fallujah, they tried to be surgical about it all, minimize civilian casualties. The city came alive with enemy. Carefully discerning non-combatant from enemy caused them to suffer terribly. The new fangled SWAT-like, collateral-damage-minimizing four man stack that we are now taught to clear rooms was abandoned in favor of an old-school, Cold War era urban battle drill. They started kicking in doors and tossing fragmentation grenades into rooms, subsequently storming them with guns blazing. Just like when we thought we'd be going head to head with the Soviet juggernaut, taking Moscow. I wasn't there, but that's what I've heard.
How do I feel about all this? I stopped following the news prior to the initial invasion. I'm not a Ranger, but I remember the first line of their creed: "Recognizing that I volunteered...fully knowing the hazards of my chosen profession....". I'm an Infantryman by choice. The pros and cons of this war, whether it's right or wrong, sometimes seem hopelessly spun by both sides. That's not an excuse, but at this time, feeling either way does me no good. I told myself in the spring of 2003 that regardless of my feelings, I swore an oath. There were people whose lives would depend on me doing my job, as mine would depend on them doing theirs. If they sent me, I would go. We swore to defend this nation. A democratic nation's moral burdens and obligations, and how it acts on them is a matter between the people and their government. A nation's defense depends on the swift, potent reaction of it's military at the behest of it's lawful authorities, who are presumably an instrument of the will of the people it defends. If a military is being misused, the people must stop it from being so. The military is an instrument that must be quick and deadly. To do it's job properly, it must expeditiously follow lawful orders. The citizenry must decide if the lawgivers are acting properly. I haven't killed yet, but if ordered to do so, I believe that I will. If no Laws of Land Warfare are violated, I will kill all day if I have to, and I doubt that I'll have any regrets. If nothing else, I strive to be a good soldier, better trained and deadlier than my adversary. A superior predator in a world of predators. I strive to be a professional, which perhaps makes me the cruelest bastard of all.
Rest in peace, Derence and Wilgene. I believe that you were not so cruel as I. That you were good, decent men doing what you believed was necessary to defend your loved ones and your beliefs against a cruel world. I'm not sure I believe in God anymore, but if He does exist, may he keep your spirits safe and close to those who love you and whom you love. Peace.
